- You don’t listen very well.
- You only seem excited to talk with the people who have positional authority.
- Your passion feels inauthentic.
The candid feedback didn’t feel good. Like most professionals, I think, I strive for excellence in all I do. To learn that I had fallen short shattered my ego: My value (my character) was somehow called into question.
The difference between destructive and constructive feedback, however, remains the choice of the receiver. When weakened by my ego, the constructive feedback I receive from others is wrong or delivered poorly. When stronger, candid comments from others are data I can use on my journey of continuous personal improvement.
Those who have shared their candid perspectives of my actions have done so because they care. If they hadn’t cared enough, I would have heard silence. And I likely wouldn’t be here today.
Caring about others means being careful not to make choices for them which they are empowered to make. As the future belongs to those who can make the best decisions today, it’s wise to give them the information they need.
P.S. Cultures of candor are rare, yet they are required to speed new value to the market. Ahmet Tezel, PhD, Vice President, R&D for Ethicon, will join me on our Activation Session, Thursday, May 26, at 11:00am Eastern. Together we’ll explore how he and other successful leaders are winning faster by building cultures of truth-telling. You can join the discussion here. It’s free.
Hat tip to our friends at Tillamook.